Hilarity of the Week: Hundreds of Proofs of God’s Existence
A while ago I bookmarked this funny website listing a few hundred proofs of the existence of God.
The list has been watered down since I first saw the site, but here are some choice picks:
PASCAL’S ARGUMENT, a.k.a. PASCAL’S WAGER
(1) If God exists, it would be really cool. (And I would win big-time.)
(2) If God didn’t exist, it would really suck. (But I wouldn’t lose much.)
(3) Therefore, God exists. (Or, at least I should believe in God because it’s the best bet.)
ARGUMENT FROM WTC, a.k.a. ARGUMENT FROM TERRORISM (III)
(1) Terrorists destroyed the WTC, killing thousands.
(2) An intact Bible was found in the ruins.
(3) No, wait, it turns out it was a dictionary.
(4) Oh, well, God exists anyway.
ARGUMENT FROM INTIMIDATION
(1) See this bonfire?
(2) Therefore, God exists.
ARGUMENT FROM GUITAR MASTERY
(1) Eric Clapton is God.
(2) Therefore, God exists.
ARGUMENT FROM INFINITE REGRESS
(1) Ask Atheists what caused the Big Bang.
(2) Regardless of their answer, ask how they know this.
(3) Continue process until the Atheist admits he doesn’t know the answer to one of your questions.
(4) You win!
(5) Therefore, God exists.
ARGUMENT FROM LACK OF EVIDENCE (II) (MODIFIED SIMPSON’S ARGUMENT)
(1) God, if you exist, please give me absolutely no sign.
(2)
(3) Therefore, God exists.
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